Practice The Subjunctive With Gael García Bernal

I Want You To Want Me    is an old song from the late 70s that happens to be a good way to practice one of the more challenging tenses in Spanish.

Every line of the chorus is in the Subjunctive tense.

I want you to want me.
I need you to need me.
I'd love you to love me.
I'm beggin' you to beg me.
I want you to want me.
I need you to need me.
I'd love you to love me.


Luckily there is a Spanish version of this song Quiero Que Me Quieras. 

Here are the lyrics so you can sing along with dishy Gael Garcia Bernal

Quiero que me quieras 
quiero que me adores 
quiero que me sientas 
que urge que me ames 

Words in bold are in the subjunctive tense.

Spanish Conditional Tense/ Conjugate

Conjugating the Spanish Conditional

Add the following endings to the end of the infinative

yo ía

tú  ías

usted ía

nosotros íamos

ustedes ían

 Use a bucket full of ís and as.  It looks like a bunch of popcorn which works nicely because  the conditional tense is frequently spoken  in  a movie theater  setting.

Would you like to see a movie?

We should see a horror movie.

Would you prefer to see a comedy?

Would you eat popcorn?

Could we arrive on time?

You should sit down.

Would you be quite.

Would you like to fight?

The Spanish Conditional is a lot nicer than saying "shut the fuck up"

Future Tense/ Irregular Verbs

 Here are 12 Spanish verbs that have an irregular stem in the Spanish future tense. That means the stem is weird but the ending is the same as the normal future tense verbs.

This is an easy way to remember the list. If you can count to 12 and rhyme, you're bright enough to remember which verb is irregular.

Number	Rhymes With	Makes You Think Of…	Reminds You of This Verb	Changes It’s Stem To This In The Future Tense
One	Ton	to know a ton	Saber	Sabr
Two	Do	To do or to make	Hacer	Har
Three	Fee	The fee…to cost	Valer	Valdr
Four	Whore	Part of a whore’s job is to come	Venir	Vendr
Five	Jive	Jive talking, to say	Decir	Dir
Six	Dicks	If someone is being a dick everyone wants to leave	Salir	Saldr
Seven	Kevin	I got nothing for this one….so I just think Kevin will be there	Haber	Habr
Eight	Mate	A mate should be a good fit	Caber	Cabr
Nine	Dine	To set the table	Poner	Pondr
Ten	Yen	To want or like something	Querer	Querr
Eleven	Chevron	A Chevron is a kind of decoration that some uniforms have	tener	Tendr
Twelve noon	Tune	To be able to carry a tune	Poder	Podr

The Future Tense

The Spanish future  tense is the easiest verb tense to conjugate- Just like the future in real life. Which is to say that the future brings ease and automation. The Spanish tense is almost that simple

If you can remember the verb in its original form, you're half way there. Because all you do is add an ending to the verb in it's infinitive state.

And also like the future, the endings are predictable

hablaré ( I will speak-informal )

hablarás ( You will speak-formal ) )

hablará ( You will speak )

hablarémos ( We will speak )

hablarán ( You will speak- plural)

Each ending starts with an A except for Yo and Nosotros which begins with an E.

So I think to myself that everyone (Tú, Usted, and  Ustedes )   may be getting As but  I and us ( Yo and Nosotros ) are getting Es for excellence!

Also, take note that all the endings have an accent mark. Which, for memorization purposes looks like a solar panel. Which hopefully we will all have in the FUTURE.

Hace...Que With Past Tense Verbs

Hace... que with a present tense verb says how long you have been doing something that you are still jacking with now.

Hace...que with a past tense verb says how long AGO you did something.

For example, use Hace +Time Frame + Que + Present Tense Verb to say how long you have been smoking. Hace quince años que fumo. ( It  has been 15 years that I have been smoking).


When you quit smoking, and you want to say how long AGO  you quit, use the same formula above but use a past tense verb.

Hace + Time Frame+ Que + Past Tense Verb = AGO

 Hace dos minutos que dejé de fumar. ( I quit smoking two minutes ago)

The convoluted way I remember that hace...que with a past tense verb means ago goes something like this:

Ago sounds a lot like Ago-go - as in Go-Go boots. Go-Go boots are a fashion from the past. I picture the hace...que formula but this time the Verb part of it is wearing said boots from the past. This indicates that the statement is referring to how long AGO something happened.


To jolt my memory, this is what I see in my mind's eye or scribbled on a discrete portion of my forearm.

Talking About Time Using Hace...Que/ present tense verbs

If you want to say how long it as has been that you ( or anyone else) have/ has been doing something, here  is the  four-part formula:

Hace + Length of time  that it HAS BEEN since the action of time has been going on + Que + The Verb (in present tense)

or if you want to shrink this down so it can fit in your head or on the palm of your hand...

Examples

Hace 10 años que como una dieta vegetariana.

Hace 10 años que  hago ejercicio cada dia.

Hace 10 años que soy sin amigos.

It has been 10 years that I have been eating a vegetarian diet.

It has been 10 years that I have been exercising every day.

It has been 10 years that I have been without friends.

Past Participle Irregulars

Imagine two friends talking in their own shorthand about some poor bastard's inappropriate behavior, 

When they mean to say, " Him?? Definitely a pervert!" they might say "Him?? Def a prrv!" Which is a handy mnemonic for 10 common verbs that are irregular in the Past Participle

Hacer ( hecho)
Imprimir (impreso)                                  HIM
Morir (Muerto)

Decir ( dicho)
Escribir ( escrito)                                      DEF                            
Freír (frito)

Abrir (abierto)                                            A

             
Poner ( puesto)
Romper ( roto)
Resolver (resuelto)                                  PRRV
Volver ( Vuelto)

The Spanish Past Participle

A past participle is a verb that is used as an adjective.

Example:

Take the verb To Fuck.  If you were to say I'm Fucked, you have used a  verb (to fuck)  that has been reassigned as an adjective. In other words, it is a past participle. 

Many past participles in English are formed by adding ed at the of the verb.

The Spanish past participle is almost as easy.

Step 1

  cut off the ar er or ir ending

Step 2

Either add ada or ida depending on what kind of verb ending it has.

(ar verbs get ada. ir and er verbs get ida)

 I've likened the forming of the  Past participle  to a gender reassignment surgery so that it will be harder to forget.

First step is to  cut a few particles off  the verb.

ouch!

Second step  is to attach the new particles that will make it a past participle

You have to admit that the new ending looks a lot like "bells on a pole" which ties in nicely with my idea that forming the Past Participle is akin to a gender reassignment surgery.

FYI, Joder means to fuck.

The Irregular Verbs For The Tú Positive Command

There are 8 irregular verbs in the Spanish Tú positive command.

 

If you can remember the following mnemonic, then you can remember these 8 crazy bastards of the tú positive command.

 

 Mnemonic: SAL SAYS HE HAS TAMPONS...DIVE IN !

 

Translated ( Sal Se Ve Haz Ten Pon... Di Ven !)

 

Sal (Salir)

Sé (Ser)

Ve (Ir)

Haz (Hacer)

Ten ( Tener)

Pon (Poner)

Di (Decir)

Ven (Venir)

 

Spanish Commands

Conjugating Spanish commands is so similar to conjugating  the Spanish subjunctive that the two verb tenses look a lot like twins and in most cases, the they are.

The family relationship between the Spanish Subjunctive and Spanish Commands breaks down like this:

The Identical  Quadruplets:
The Spanish Subjunctive
The Usted Command ( both positive and negative)
The Ustedes Command ( both positive and negative)
The Tú Command ( Negative only)

These guys all are conjugated the same way ( put in yo form. Chop off the O. Add the ER present tense ending if it is an AR verb or add the AR  present tense ending if it is an ER or IR verb)
These guys all have the same irregular verbs which are Dar, Ir, Estar, Saber, and Ser.
These guy all follow the CAR GAR ZAR spelling changes.


The Fraternal Twin
The Nosotros/as commands are just like the above with the exception of one strange quirk. The positive  command for the verb  Ir is VAMOS and the negative IR command is NO VAYAMOS.

The Family Bastard
 The Tú positive command is a bastard in two important ways. First, it has a conjugation that defies logic ( conjugate by using whatever the  present usted  form  of the verb is). Then, it has 8 crazy irregular verbs.

 

Spanish Subjunctive/Spanish Command Family Tree

The Bastard  of the Family